The Art of Repelling People: A Surprising Path to Getting Better Clients, More Money and Real Success

by Christine Kane

My personal trainer is a tough strong scary guy.

One day he complained that many of his clients were “slackers” and didn’t do the work to get the results they supposedly wanted.  He admitted that some of them didn’t even show up for appointments.

Unfortunately, this situation is all too common for passionate entrepreneurs whose work is based in their life purpose.

I told my trainer that the first step to attracting better clients would require that he master the art of repelling people.


It’s true.  If you find yourself in a situation like my trainer, you’ll need to take some clear actions in order to Uplevel your clients and your success. (And yes, it means that some of your prospects will inevitably go away.)

Action #1: Know your ideal peep inside and out.

I asked my trainer what kind of client he really wanted to work with.  Like, if his schedule could be filled with this particular kind of person all day long, who would that be?

Once he was able to articulate those attributes, I told him that he needed to set up his standards so that his ideal person could self-select when they were inquiring about his services.

This means that it’s up to my trainer to lead his prospects by sharing his high standards up front:  Requiring longer contracts for long-term results, enforcing cancellation policies so the client is accountable, getting serious about their diet and nutrition…

At that moment, my tough strong scary trainer looked terrified.  “Well, they might get mad! What if they don’t hire me?”

Here, I got a little bit in his face. (Hey, he just made me do 10 pull-ups. I felt entitled!)

I said, “Well, you don’t want to work with slackers, right?  That means that you have to be the one to make that happen. Do you want people to LIKE you – or do you want to work only with the people who are truly committed to getting results?”

This is the ultimate challenge of any entrepreneur who commits to happiness and success.  You have to know your ideal client, and be willing to let go of anyone unlike that person.

Action #2:  Adopt an abundance mindset.

My trainer’s fear of people “getting mad” is probably the most common fear of every entrepreneur when faced with their own clarity and the thought of repelling people.

The lack mindset says, “I will forever have to work with anyone and everyone because I’m lucky to even have clients. Things are scarce.”

The abundance mindset says, “I work ONLY with people who are a great match for me because I will be more productive and they will get better results. I know they’re out there.”

As long as you act from the lack mindset, you will be miserable because you’re making decisions based in fear.

Action #3:  Take time to create policies.

How do you want your clients to behave? What are you not willing to tolerate? Turn it all into a list of policies and share this list when a prospect wants to work with you.  Be sure to explain that your policies are set up so that they get great results and to ensure that you have a powerful relationship.

Teach people how to work with you, and they will follow your lead.  If your clients don’t “behave,” the problem is that you haven’t taught them how to work with you. (Same goes for dogs, kids, employees – and well, everything!)


A few weeks later, as we finished a session, my trainer said, “Hey by the way, I tried that stuff you told me. This woman came to me saying she wanted to lose 40 pounds but she only wanted one or two sessions.  I said no.  I told her about my 3-month commitment and what I require in order to take her on as a client.  And she signed up! It worked!  She even sort of looked surprised and happy when I said all that. Like, that made her WANT to work with me more.”

He also shared that one man had gotten irate and walked out.

Both outcomes are amazing!  They’re the result of honoring yourself and others enough to be clear and let go.  The long-term effects of clarity will far outweigh the momentary excitement or disappointment of the prospect’s choice.   You’ll create a higher level of success for both your business AND your client.

And THAT is the true desired result!

Christine Kane is the Mentor to Women Who are Changing the World. She helps women uplevel their lives, their businesses and their success. Her weekly LiveCreative eZine goes out to over 20,000 subscribers. If you are ready to take your life and your world to the next level, you can sign up for a F.R.E.E. subscription at

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