3 Tips for Establishing Rapport Without Saying A Word by @Audj_K

3 Tips for Establishing Rapport Without Saying A Word

by Audrey Joy Kwan

Nobody like’s being sold. You get that icky, sleazy and slimy feeling. Like it our not, every entrepreneur starting her business journey must accept that her business is not just to create but also to sell.

Sale’s is really just an exchange of value. You’ve created something that will help someone and in exchange you receive money for the value you provide.

The problem begins when we think of sales as pushing a product or a service onto someone that we either don’t believe in or think they don’t need and then hang them out to dry. That’s not you (right?).

Sales is a relationship, like all relationships there is a rapport building phase that is the basis for strong customer and client relationship.

The equation is simple, if you can establish rapport; you have more sales and increase your bottom line.

Not all rapport building is through the spoken word, between 60 -93% of your communication is non-verbal. In networking, meetings and pitching use these 3 nonverbal rapport-building tips.

1. Master the Handshake
Women are the worst offenders when it comes’ to a weak handshake. The act of touch not only creates a scientific increase of the bonding hormone called oxytocin but it also establishes your credibility.

A credible handshake has a few key defining factors.
• Firm. It doesn’t feel like a wet noodle or a death grip.
• Straight up and down. Your hand should not be under or over another person’s hand. An under-hand shake is passive and an over-hand shake is aggressive.
• Shaking motion is an up and down bounce with three pumps.

Unfortunately, people who have weak handshakes typically don’t know. Practice on a friend and ask for honest feedback.

2. Use the Power of Seating
The power of seating arrangement is a nonverbal technique that presents itself all the time in sales conversations. Whether you’re having coffee with a potential client or bringing them into your office, seating affects people’s mental space.

Psychologist Robert Sommer did a major study in the power of seating from the University of California. Researchers found three things happen when you seat someone directly across from you:
• She speaks in shorter sentences
• She recalls less of what you say
• She says “no” more often

Angled seating, on the other hand, increases leads to more “yes’s.” Try setting up your office space so that guests are angled towards your desk or if you’re at a coffee shop sit diagonally from your client or find a curbed booth. Ensure that the seat heights are equal and don’t choose seats that sink in, your torso should always be above your knees when seated.

3. Keep Your Hands Visible at All Times
Keep your hands in sight because your hands are trust indicators. Women in particular have the habit of keeping hands underneath tables when sitting or tucking your hands between or under your legs.

When jurors were asked to rate defendants in trial cases, the defendants who put their hands underneath the table were considered more sneaky and mistrustful. The practice of making your hands visible is the number one indicator of trust. If you’re doing video sales calls, move your seat back far enough so that your torso and hands are visible.

Next Steps:
When you have a confident and credible foundation you set yourself up to have authentic sales conversation that feel less icky. Practice and get comfortable with these three non-verbal rapport building skills to build that unshakable foundation.


Audrey Joy KwanAudrey Joy Kwan is a business soft skills expert. She helps entrepreneurs raise their influence and make more sales with confidence and results. Audrey helps her clients connect, compel and sell with authenticity using the strategic brain of a Masters Degree in Communications and coaching certification in Advanced Body Language Training. To get her Epic Guide on First Impressions visit www.audreyjoykwan.com

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