by Alejandra Rojas
For so long in my life, I’ve watched the money field being dominated by masculine attitudes. I recalled watching coworkers yelling to the other one “I’m killing it” when investing under excitement and buying items to feed their masculinity.
I remember having a conversation with a coworker about the future. You know the “What have you plan for the future?” conversation. He asked me what I’d planned to do in a few years, but almost without space for an answer, he started to lecture me about what to do with my money.
He didn’t bother to ask what I wanted for my life, what made me happy; he was just in a rush to give me indications on what I needed to follow to succeed. He went from investing in the stock market to applying for the X credit card that gave me cash back on trips and restaurants. And of course, he emphasises I had to spend as much as possible on it so I could upgrade my status on it.
The thing is that the situations didn’t resonate with me at all. The idea of extravaganza/ “I can rule the world” because I have money, was definitely not what I wanted to focus.
Instead, I needed to bring the best value possible to my life using the tools I’ve studied for, finances. I thought about money as something that should be meaningful for our soul and not just a superficial item, knowledge or action.
As a woman who appreciates the things for the value they can bring in our lives, I was determined to find how money can mean something more than what people are used to.
That coffee conversation for me was crucial to understanding that, of course, we do have different perceptions and understanding about the ways to live and manage our lives. But, as women, we have a fantastic strength inside us that enables us to live a more meaningful money journey, and we need to use it.
So, ever since that coffee talk, I started to work on finances with that female feeling based on a purpose. I was asking myself what role money should play in my life. And I came across with five things that enhanced my feminine gift to bring meaning to my life.
1. Setting up goals with my soul.
If I wanted to change something within my environment, I had to start by changing myself. I was not any longer willing to pursue a vague and vanish success goal for anyone else but me.
I had to close my self and be the most selfish that I’ve been for years to think about what made me and just me happy. What was the success I wanted to seek and how that would contribute to be the person I wanted to be.
I was not any longer looking to satisfy someone else ideal life; I was decided to look inside my head the dreams and ideas that encourage my soul to make them happen.
2. Being grateful for what I have.
Starting my day by saying three things I’m grateful for, connects me with myself.
Part of being more intentional and bringing purpose to my life was to recognise everything that I’ve achieved so far. Without starting my days without being grateful, I just continued with the practice of asking for more without appreciating what I already had.
Not recognizing what I had made me lose sight of the moment, and the whole essence of what I was working for was wasted. I was determined to use my feminine sense to recognize the essential things I had in my life.
3. Setting up boundaries to talk about the money.
I get it! I work on finances, I need to see money most of my time, but there is something else more significant than the money I had to focus.
While discovering that something, I took my home as my safe place to reconnect with myself and find the purpose I was looking for.
I set boundaries within my home and myself to have money points free zones. Areas at home that should be just to connect with myself and with the dreams I had.
I was determined to take power out from money and drive happiness and joy to my life beyond everything.
4. Focus on transmitting my happy thoughts.
It is not really a thing that we often do, but it is that feminine side of positivism and acting from a place of happiness what got me to start sharing all my happy thoughts. Because I do believe we are what we talk. By speaking, we can transmit what we think, and what we believe is what define us.
I focused on transmitting happy thoughts instead of going on circles over problems or money matters. If I couldn’t change the past, then I had to make sure I learned my lesson to avoid the same mistake twice. But crying o braking my mindset over it wouldn’t change anything.
People say women are quick learners, and once we’ve learned the lesson, we are ready to move forward in any aspect of our lives, so I figured money should not be any different.
5. Expressing my point of view.
Later on, I understood I had contributed to keeping the masculine understanding of money on my environment.
Well yes!! if every time people were talking about it, and I just limited myself to listen without expressing my point of view, I was just letting that masculine point of view flowed all over the place.
Honestly, nobody will notice your different ideas if you don’t speak up. I was determined to stop that! Besides, if a woman is determined to be heard, she can sure do it.
So I took a step forward on the conversations and started finding my voice about money issues within my self, my family and the public.
But you know what I found? More people, many women and men, resonated with my ideas every time more. It was just incredible how people felt a lot more comfortable talking about their dreams, their happiness rather than the numbers on their bank account.
Alejandra Rojas is a financial coach who helps millennial women unlock their wealth potential through mindset and money management techniques. Access Alejandra’s Free Finance Roadmap and get started achieving your dreams.