The One Question You Should Be Asking Yourself Every Day by @chaosandkiddos

Modern Femme

by Katy Blevins

Life as an entrepreneur is often wrought with constant challenges, decisions, obstacles and strategies that can leave business owners spun up with anxiety, confusion and doubt. The pressure to perform and claim “success” is ever-present along with a misplaced expectation to project “all’s well!” to the rest of the working world.

It can leave us mentally exhausted, emotionally isolated and wondering why we ever got into this mess. Why is this?

When you think of the word success, do any of these come to mind?

  • Profitable company
  • Large bank account
  • Top in your marketplace
  • Vacation home
  • Luxury lifestyle

When you consider how society defines success, what pressure do you feel as an entrepreneur? Have you ever felt like this?

  • I need to work long hours in order to be successful.
  • If I leave work early to attend my child’s soccer game, I’m not committed to my job.
  • If I don’t work harder than everyone else, I’ll fail.
  • I don’t have time for anything else but growing my business.
  • I have to be willing to do anything it takes in order to succeed.

Do you think this definition of success is healthy? What if we started designing our own personal definitions of success? What if we embraced a new ideal – that success looks different to every person and there is no one definition that qualifies the one “right way” to succeed?

What if success shifted away from quantity and instead embraced quality? What if success brought these words to mind instead?

  • Motivated to work
  • Attentive to self-care
  • Present at home
  • Financial needs met
  • Personal needs met
  • Professional needs appropriately balanced

The Modern Femme Movement was created to give working women the opportunity to redefine their personal success so they can rediscover the life they want and take steps to get back on course. Their course…not yours, not mine, not anyone else’s.

This new freedom allows us to visualize the life that we want, on our terms, so that we can keep that picture in mind when those challenges, obstacles, decisions and challenges arise in our business ventures. What does that life look like?

My personal definition of success is a professional lifestyle that allows me to meet my children at the bus stop as they get home from school everyday. What is yours?

When you define your personal success in such a clear and intimate manner, you reduce all of life’s decisions, personal and professional, down to one simple qualifier. One simple question that dictates every next step. Ask yourself, every, single day –

Is this decision taking me one step closer to my definition of success or one step farther from my version of a successful life?

Make that question yours. Is this decision taking me one step closer to being able to get my kids off of the school bus at the end of the day or one step farther away from that dream?

Remember, your life is a journey. Embrace your failures, the rabbit trails, the victories and the setbacks that you encounter as an entrepreneur. This daily question is not the easy button that opens a straight shot, point A to point B path to your “perfect” life. Surround yourself with women that will celebrate and encourage you on your journey, supporting you in the ups and in the downs. We all know life as a small business owner means encountering points C, D, E, R, and Z on your way to your final destination. Your very best you is a work in progress. Give yourself permission to allow others to join you on your journey. Give yourself permission to thrive on your own terms. Join the Movement.


Katy BlevinsKaty Blevins is co-founder of The Modern Femme Movement, a community platform redefining success on a global scale by equipping female entrepreneurs with the tools to discover a meaningful life that is both professionally adventurous and fully present at home. Katy and her long-time business partner, Somer Chambley, work closely with small business owners from all walks of life, via their sister company, The Hampton Roads Creative, to help restore their energy, focus and strategy in the social media arena by clearly defining their purpose and unique go-to-market voice. Katy is a working mom to twin toddlers, so is no stranger to the crazy that is developing a successful business while also maintaining some semblance of order at home. You can follow her tips and tricks to a more manageable life on her personal blog, Chaos & Kiddos. Catch up with her on Twitter @chaosandkiddos.

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One Reply to “The One Question You Should Be Asking Yourself Every Day by @chaosandkiddos”

  1. Mitch Mitchell

    Well, even though this is supposedly geared towards women, since none of them seem to have responded (unless everyone’s in moderation) I guess I’d like to step forward first.

    This is a great post because it makes people think about what success really looks like in their eyes. I’ll own up to the monetary thing because my only real goal in life is to have $10 million sitting in the bank; seems I’m losing that battle but it keeps me striving for bigger and better things all the time.

    I do feel like I need to work harder than everyone else, but it’s in the area of marketing because I’m in a tough industry where the major players aren’t online, and I put in some serious hours; I really do need to learn how to relax. Yet, I also take myself out for lunch here and there, sometimes to dinner, to make sure I leave the house every once in a while when I’m mainly working from home.

    I don’t settle for contentment because how does one measure that? One might feel content if they can pay their bills, but what happens if the fridge goes on the blink or a tire busts up; suddenly you need more money to take care of those things. Truthfully, I’d be happy with a half a million in the bank and half a million in investments because I’ve done the math and, based on the way my wife & I live our lives, it would pay all our bills and allow us to pretty much do everything we want to while replenishing itself every year. At our age, we don’t need it for too long. 🙂

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