by Keiwana Eaton
We all need boundaries, but we all don’t have boundaries. The necessity of boundaries is for the purpose of protecting you, your personal space, and your time, all of which yields good health, positive energy, and peace of mind. More times than not, exhaustion sets in because we haven’t set boundaries for ourselves, for work, or for friends and family. We neglect ourselves to the point of exhaustion, burnout, or emotional breakdown. In the worst case scenario, not having boundaries is detrimental to our physical health. But how does this happen when we are the CEOs of our own lives? I’ll tell you how, and then I’ll give you 3 tips to regain and maintain control of your life.
If you are an empath like me and many others that I know, you naturally want to help people and solve the world’s problems. You are naturally a fixer, whether it’s a fixer of your problems or someone else’s. You might even take on more than your fair share of work and emotional baggage by simply helping others. If you catch my drift here, other people’s emotional and physical baggage with or without yours will literally drain you, and before you know it, you may feel heavy burdened, down and out, depressed and in the slumps. It happens so rapidly…or does it? Fatigue and stress are the number one causes of many health problems and even death. Long before our bodies begin to spiral out of control or go wacky, we neglect every warning sign, such as dark cloud moments when negative people enter your space, manipulative behavior, and restlessness to name a few. These traits and behaviors still our joy, are detrimental to our health, and leave us powerless. But don’t worry, I got your back! Here are three tips that to regain and maintain your position as CEO of YOU:
1. Know the company you keep.
Above I mentioned “dark cloud” moments, and this refers to individuals who are Negative Nancys, Debbie Downers, and Rain on Your Parade Rachels. They are like a sudden dreary and gloomy day when the sun is bright, the air is fresh, and the trees are a vibrant green, with no warning of clouds or a thunderstorm in the sky. As soon as they come in your presence or within your personal space, your energy is immediately turned off. It’s like they instantly suck your happiness dry. I try to stay away from such people, but if you are not black and white like me, then you may be able to handle these type of people in spurts. Either way, you must know the energies that you allow into your personal space.
2. Understand that boundaries are not a form of disrespect.
This is important as empaths are also people pleasers, and we don’t necessarily want to hurt anyone’s feelings. In this case, we are more willing to grant leniency to having no boundaries in place at all. Grave mistake! Boundaries are no disrespectful and are not hurtful to people who understand you and the need for self-care. In fact, people respect you more when you are disciplined enough to establish and impose boundaries that protect you. Doing so, allows you to manage yourself and your relationships. After all, you are the CEO of you!
3. You are your prized possession.
Maybe you should read that again…and again…and again to let it soak in every fiber of your being. Let it ooze through you. Pause a little longer if need be. Say it with me: You. Are. Your. Prized. Possession. Without you, nothing that you do would be getting done in the way that you do it. Aren’t you a badass? Do you see yourself as a badass? If not, well let me be the first to tell you or remind you…YOU ARE YOUR PRIZED POSSESSION BECAUSE YOU ARE A BADASS AND NOTHING GETS DONE IN THE WAY THAT YOU DO IT! If we do not see ourselves in this light, we simply do not value ourselves enough to uphold our standards and boundaries. Your time is valuable. Your energy is valuable. Your space is valuable. You are valuable. If you are a mother, your value extends for generations. If you are a wife, could your spouse be making it without your assistance? Why not take time to care for you, to put you first? Is it that you possibly think putting yourself first is selfish? Well, no it’s not! Or is it just that you can’t possibly see yourself of being more important or just as important as the people you take care of? Let me remind you that you are a badass and nothing would get done in the way that you do it! Sometimes, we need a kick in the butt instead of a gentle reminder that we are our priority too. From this moment forward, recite those words to yourself every day as often as you’d like. Let it become your daily affirmation.
As I wrap this up, it’s important that we regain and maintain control over our lives. Our personal space, positive vibes, and our time is valuable to us on the same authentic scale that we hold ourselves accountable to respecting other people’s time, space, and energy. Regain focus and control by implementing these three very simple tips. Setting boundaries helps you to manage relationships, be assertive, and get your voice back!
Keiwana Eaton is an authentic Life Strategist and Founder of I AM My Priority, Inc. She teaches her best pro strategizing tips with bulls-eye laser focus from her 10 years+ in technical training, recruiting, and inside the walls of TOP corporate public and private offices, as well as over 2 years coaching and strategizing with entry level to senior level driven, passionate, go getters just like you!
She helps her clients uncover their authentic selves through life talks which includes accepting the past them, coming to terms with the present them, to shape the future them. Learn more and get her free Goal Smashing Made Easy Workbook by visiting www.iammypriority.org.