When You’re Emotionally “Checked Out” From Your Day Job

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2 Replies to “When You’re Emotionally “Checked Out” From Your Day Job”

  1. Deb

    I really needed this article today. I work two jobs to try to provide for my family. Both of them have drama, office politics, a lack of training and plenty of noticing where a person lacks. One of them isn’t even willing to work with me about excess hours that leave me drained. I am getting to where I withdraw more from both of them. I feel like I need to conserve the energy I do have for doing laundry and spending time with my family.
    I wish I could find a second job I could do from home where I could just type things up; something where contact was minimal to none.
    On the plus side it has helped me to care less what people think of me. I can only do my best.

  2. Virginia

    “Checking out” of something emotionally is thought of as a bad thing, so I am happy to have come across your post. It’s helped me feel a bit less guilty. A little over three years ago, I was called to work in a different part of my office. The spot I was in was as an admin., but I got to do a lot of writing, editing and proofreading thanks to my boss, who was flexible and saw the benefit of using the skills I had acquired in previous jobs. The spot I am in now is strictly clerical and quite boring. My organization doesn’t offer training so I could get to a higher post or take on different responsibilities. It serves the organization better to have an army of admin. staff, both to do admin. work but also to “babysit” the higher-ups. I am no babysitter nor am I a waitress or a gofer, so I don’t think I am a good fit for this job. I would like to go back to my old job with the more flexible boss, but I am prevented from doing so due to politics. I could move to other companies easier than most of my colleagues can. But positions in regular companies pay significantly less than what I earn now, barely a living wage commensurate with experience, and I have a mortgage to pay. I cannot lose this job. So I’m stuck, and I’ve checked out. I will continue to do my best on the job, but I do not care enough to take work home with me or even talk about it too much. When I get home, I’d just rather forget that I was at work at all, though the wasted day still frustrates me. So I have been diligent about finding outside opportunities to nourish myself and grow in different ways. Yoga classes, spinning classes, writing classes, reading more often (sometimes on the job – thank you Kindle Cloud), journaling, basically ensuring that I get outside “training” to make myself a better person. I cannot control work, my bosses, or my co-workers (some of who are good friends, though not many), so I will concentrate on what I can control. As for my office, if they think it’s OK to shelve me, to treat me like I don’t exist until they need something, to laugh at me or ignore me when I ask to go back to my old boss (I’ve asked several times), to consider me unimportant, that’s their problem. I have not done anything to deserve that, and I can’t fix that. Those are their own problems and faults they have to work out themselves. I’ve already worked here long enough that people SHOULD know my worth and what I am capable of, and it’s not my problem that they care more about their own convenience than the “team” we are encouraged to be. I think once I realized that, it set me free.

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