by Denise Damijo | Featured Contributor
On your climb to success, you are going to come up against a lot of obstacles, naysayers, and people that just plain want to see you fail. It can already be cold on your entrepreneurial climb but it can be even colder if your husband doesn’t have your back. You may think that it would be something that your Fairy-God-Mother would have to make happen in order for it to happen to you but there is a way to know how to get your man to support you building your business.
As a married woman with 5 children, early on in my journey; I felt like my husband was giving me mixed messages about me starting my business. Before I actually began my journey of starting my business, my husband used to give me hints as to what business I should start. In my mind, I thought he had not a clue about what my passion was and I always just brushed it off. Finally, I found the direction in where I wanted to go and I got up enough courage to make that big jump. Well, I thought that my husband would be delighted and automatically give me the support that I so much desired.
It did NOT happen that way at ALL!!!!
Even though my husband wasn’t mean or openly negative, I felt a little resistance and definitely a lack of the supportive communication that I needed. My husband wasn’t a troll or anything but he definitely wasn’t my biggest cheerleader.
I had no idea what I had done wrong when I thought he was practically leading me to the entrepreneurial lifestyle before. Eventually, we were able to get on the same page but it wasn’t until I discovered these MAJOR hidden secrets that changed the game.
Ask his honest opinion
Before you even decided to start your business, you along with many others have probably gone out to gather your support system. Your spouse was most likely on that list because you care about their opinion and also want to experience your journey together. Just make sure that you ask them to tell you their honest and non-biased opinion. Listen to what he has to say even if it isn’t what you wanted or thought you needed him to say. Despite what he says, make sure that you thank him and let him know that you appreciate his honest opinion because it helps him to know it is ok to be open with you. This will help to keep the lines of communication open and relaxed.
Don’t sweat the small stuff
If your husband didn’t say the things that you wanted and needed him to say, DON’T GIVE UP and certainly don’t take it personal. There can be a numerous amount of reasons why he went left when you wanted him to go right. That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want to support you or will not support you in the future. Instead of letting this frustrate or disappoint you, gather more information on what is the underlying root to the reason why he was not supportive.
Know what to look for
While your gathering information, keep an open and understanding mind. Your husband may not be supporting you for resolvable reasons. It could be because he doesn’t understand how to be an entrepreneur or the journey of one. It could also be that his thoughts about business are a little outdated. Or it could possibly be that he doesn’t know where he stands in the equation and it intimidates him. His natural instinct is to make sure to take care of you and the family. If you are like many other women that dream BIG, you may become the breadwinner and he may feel like that can take away his ability to perform his natural instinct. Another huge reason why your spouse didn’t support you building your business is that he is clueless on how to support you.
Make it easy for him
Your husband had to get to know you and observe you in order to know what you liked and what he needed to do to make you happy. It took you being transparent and some time. With your business, drop the good stuff by being transparent about your business. Catch his interest with things that you know he would want to know. Some of those things may be how passionate you are about your business, will you be helping people or the world, what other people are saying about what you are doing, and how much money you will make compared to how much expense and time you will have to invest in order to build your business.
Reassure him that he will not lose his wife and friend
The last thing that your man wants to do is lose his wife and friend while you are busy building your business. Let him know how important he is, how you value his opinion, how you appreciate any help and support that he gives you, and how you are so grateful that he is on this journey with you. Also tell him about the fun you will be able to experience together because of the time, income, and opportunity your business will bring. While you are dreaming big, make sure that you are dreaming with him. Paint the most attractive picture for the both of you and then go after it proactively together.
Building your business is already exciting. Building your business with your husband completely on board is one of the best things that you can ever experience and cherish.