Read more from Nicole at

She Is Not Stupid: 6 Reasons Women Stay in Bad Relationships

Read more from Nicole at

“Why Did She Stay?”

When our friend or family member reveals to us that she is in a bad a relationship, a familiar response is, “Why don’t you just leave?” Unfortunately, for many in troubled unions, this is easier said than done. The following are six reasons women choose to overstay the life of a relationship.


1. Fear for her safety.

Some women feel it is physically and/or financially safer for them and their children to stay than to leave. This may seem counter-intuitive to those in healthy relationships, but for women in bad unions, it makes sense. This is especially the case if they tried to leave before and encountered more problems than when they were together.


2. Desire to keep the family unit in tact.

When a woman with children leaves her partner, she may face disdain by the extended family and friends for breaking-up the unit. It makes no difference to these outsiders that the family partnership was already broken because of the toxic couple’s toxic relationship.


3. She has nowhere else to go.

If she has no job or money to physically re-locate, the thought of being homeless is less appealing than the thought of staying where she is. She can convince herself that the problems are “not that bad,” if it means she will have a roof over her head.


4. Lack of emotional support.

Many people say that it is none of their business and they do not want to get involved. When this happens, a woman in a bad situation may feel as if she is alone and does not know how to seek help to escape her current circumstances.


5. She thinks she can change him.

She does not realize that change only comes when one wants it.


6. She thinks it is normal based upon her family history.

When you grow-up in a dysfunctional family, you fail to see how it is wrong. It’s not that you think you deserve it, you just think this is how relationships work. You have no healthy frame of reference.


No matter what the reason, as friends and loved ones, the conversation must shift from calling her names and the victim blaming question, “Why did she stay?” to affirming statements that will give her the strength to see she is worthy of better than what she is receiving.

photo credit: DSC_6002 via photopin (license)

Share :